Stopping the Chaos

Getting Off

Enough of the never-ending uncertainty and neglect,
Circling life on reflex, complexity of thought so far
Detached from reality. Invert this self-absorption,
Narcissistic analysis of weakness, self-malignant.
Too long uncontrolled, from extremes swinging.

Change the motion, pendulum to centripetal, centring;
Fine-balance learned contentment with ambition, embracing
Days to short for withdrawal. Re-engage with living
Beyond these shimmered screens, this vapid malcontent.
Even sweet dreams are stolen by avoidant sleep.

Breathe deep and taste bitter pride once more, climb
Onwards, mists are clearing, higher - sense it,
Find a foothold; struggle on, for falling is still
Better than stagnating in forgotten pools, who cares
For the blinded king of muddied puddles?

Broken dreams mirror accepted defeat, sweep aside
Doomed expectation of idylls, onwards, dare the
Unknown, consider the blessings carried forward
And the naive promise wept over in solitude, for
Only I can choose to grasp bitter disappointment.

I may be around a little less for a while. The real world needs my full attention but you wil still be in my thoughts. My email/MSN is in my profile for any who want. I am well, just facing some difficult changes I need to make.

T.

Daddy I'm fine...

Many thanks to all for the expression of concern. I guess the poem sounds a little dramatic, but what it's really talking about is me getting out of a mental rut I've been stuck in for a while. I had a hard time dealing with the real working world after my university idealism and I've gone down a path that only leads to dissatisfaction. I need to get myself refocussed and remotivated and make the best of the many opportunities I have. The real world needs my energy and focus, so I'll be putting less of myself into cyberspace.

Thank you so much for the kind words and concern.

*hugs*

T.